I really do not think I can go on any more. Life is just too much effort. Too much work…too much everything. I wish I had never been born. I do not believe in God. I wish I did though. It might help. Sadly I just get over this:
“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent.
Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent.
Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil?
Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?”